While chatting with a friend who is due to give birth to her first baby, she confessed that she is a little nervous about welcoming her little one after having so much time to herself. Unlike me, who had four kids by the time I was 28, this friend did things a bit more responsibly and waited, reaching a more respectable age and doing a few more adult things before having kids.
Listening to her talk about how she worried she might be too selfish after all this time, I couldn’t help but smile to myself because as a veteran mom, I know exactly what will happen when she welcomes that little baby into the world: everything will change and the love for that baby will overtake everything, even your own physical need for sleep.
But still, despite knowing that she will be just fine as a mom (Also, spoiler: We’re all selfish! It’s called human nature, right?) I know what she is saying and it is something that I’ve often thought about simply because my own journey into motherhood was very different.
The truth is, I didn’t really have time to be selfish before I became a mom because it all happened so quickly. I was just starting my senior year of college and was full of hopes and dreams to switch my major to writing, study abroad and finally purchase an adult wardrobe that didn’t involve pajama pants that I had picked up at Goodwill, when I found myself staring at a positive pregnancy test. (This is not an exaggeration–I took the test just weeks into my senior year.)
Because of my fast-track into motherhood, I never fully experienced adulthood completely alone.